Let's talk about one-sided relations e abusive relationships. Yup. It's a controversial topic, but it's nice to talk about it, even to open the eyes of those who are going through this situation. Whether you're going through it, or someone you know. If this is not the case, I ask that you also read so that you do not fall into these pitfalls.
Don't worry, I'm going to try my best to take this subject lightly, even so it doesn't trigger anyone who's reading. This article is to explain what these two types of relationships are, how they occur, how to get out of it, and how to use self-love and quantum physics to heal yourself and avoid falling into it.
They are similar in many ways, but there are things that make them different. I call it relationship and relationship, but it's in the very general sense, not only in romantic relationships, but family and friends as well., because unilateral and abusive relationships happen not only in couples, but also in families and with friends.
One-sided relationships happen when there is feeling, dedication from only one side, when one of them loves and the other doesn't, but keeps giving hope to keep that one for himself. In abusive relationships, there is what we can call energetic parasitism, which would be a person the “host”, who nourishes the other with their energy, and this other, the energetic “parasite”, feeds on the vibrational energy of its host to maintain, like a weed, which needs a plant to stay alive and thus kills its host.
What do these two relationship models have in common?
The lack of reciprocity, the one-sidedness of dedication to the other. Can abusive relationships be considered one-sided relationships? Yes, but abusive relationships cover a greater depth, it covers a matter of possession over the other, while unilateral relationships just don't have a return of feelings, which is okay, no one is obligated to love the same way.
But be careful, don't confuse abusive relationships with one-sided relationships, because just as they have similarities, they have deep differences that we have to be aware of.
In unilateral relationships, there is surrender, dedication of only one, the feeling, the demonstration of love is not reciprocal, there are cases in which the one who receives this dedication takes advantage of it. For example, so-and-so likes so-and-so, she knows this and leaves him to the “bain-marie” for convenience, convenience and knowing that whenever he wants, the other will be with open arms for her. In other words, as long as it's a “good deal”, everything will be great for her, while the other will settle for these crumbs, for having this person by her side.
Now when we talk about abusive relationships, it gets worse.
This is because there is a greater game with the psychological, which results in greater damage and creates a very large emotional dependence.
This type of relationship always starts with a thousand wonders, the person proves to be amazing to you, enchants you, takes you to paradise, makes you feel good, you get attached to that person, you get into a situation of dependence because you feel special, which is treated differently. Until the part where it advances to the phase where this person who seemed to be “all the best” starts to reveal itself little by little, the monster gradually shows up. Start controlling your friendships, saying they are not to be trusted, that this friend has spread things about you, when it is not true. Control your clothes, tastes, personality, saying that your clothes, tastes and aspects of your personality are not appropriate, and even give reasons that you think are plausible. Not because the person cares about you, that you dress well and that your attitudes towards him / her hurt. But because you don't want to lose control over your "property", that someone can take your "ownership", and to prevent this from happening, your personality, your self-esteem is gradually undermined, and you fall into causal amnesia. , moves away from who you are. This becomes a relationship of parasitism, because as long as the host has something to offer, the parasite will feed on it until the moment of discarding, in this case, sucking its vibrating energy.
And speaking of discarding, this is the next phase, discarding.
Psychological, verbal, physical and/or sexual aggressions begin. The humiliations, that you're not as good as you think, that it's not all that you think, that it's YOUR luck to have someone who puts up with your way, who "ACCEPTS" you as you are, because there will never be someone who will love you so much so, that it's your fault he/she has a questionable behavior, that he/she does all this for “love”, you know? Here comes the famous phrase "I do it, but you know it's because I love you, right?" and then there's this discard, you have nothing but interest to this parasite, you've already taken all you could of your vibrational energy, you're despised, discarded, this bond formed between the two is severed.
It is at that moment that you feel torn apart, “without direction”, as if part of you had been taken away, because of this emotional dependence and as I had said above, you entered a causal amnesia, for having moved away from your essence, having undermined your self-love, your energy has already been stolen by this obsessor.
Yes, I call it an obsessor, because the OBSESSOR is everything that steals your vital energy, which takes you out of alignment with the universe, which shakes the balance of your chakras. We have 7 basic chakras located at specific points on the body that interfere with the alignment of our life, and if one is shaken, care must be taken, as they are interconnected.
The first Chakra to be affected, the muladhara chakra, which is in the coccyx, which represents the base, family, how you connect with the physical, the earth, survival itself. Rules your legs, bones, large intestine. It is through this chakra that physical, psychological and emotional security enters. When misaligned, the person finds it difficult for emotions to flow, becomes aggressive normally.
When you are not experiencing healthy relationships, you are not having pleasure in life, in a much broader sense, external and mainly internal, where true pleasure is and your emotions are very destabilized, that is to say that this second basic chakra, the chakra umbilical (or in Sanskrit Swadhistana Chakra), which is found in the genital region, is what controls pleasure and personal satisfaction in life, the "wanna" to go after your goals.
When this chakra is out of alignment, it causes emotional and reproductive imbalance, gastrointestinal problems, allergies, kidney, liver, bladder, infertility, exacerbated sexuality, in the sense of trivializing, by letting impulses control it and the appearance of sexual diseases.
The third chakra, the Manipura chakra, which is found in the navel, it is through it that emotions cross to other chakras, moving to the whole body. It is called the solar plexus because it governs our self-confidence, survival instinct, ability to learn.
Anahata Chakra, the heart chakra, is positioned in the chest region, it governs the emotional, the center of the human being's energy system, it unites the lower and upper chakras through love. When there is an imbalance in this chakra, it affects the emotions the most, causing an imbalance.
You are free to disbelieve in vibrational energy, quantum physics and chakras, but there is logic in this and from the moment I started to study these subjects and bring this into everyday practice, it opened my eyes a lot to life, the flow of the universe, the way I governed my reality. It is millenary knowledge that we are lucky to have access to today.
When we bring this knowledge about the seven chakras into our lives, we realize how much our vibrational energy influences even our relationships, our health.
And as for one-sided relationships and especially abusive relationships, when you fall into these traps, it's because your energy is no longer at all good, it has already descended to a very low level. And when you lose yourself in this vicious cycle, it confirms that you are not really vibrating in the flow of the universe.
You might also like:
- about self love
- How do you know if the relationship is abusive?
- Chakras: what they are and how they work
Abusive relationships are involved in a vicious cycle
As soon as the disposal is done, the "parasite" looks for the host after the same way it looked for you initially, as if nothing had happened, to have the disposal again.
This is repeated until the moment when the “host” decides to cut this type of relationship, in which self-love speaks louder so that a red light is lit in the person's mind saying “danger! I have to get out of this situation”, put up a barrier so that this “parasite” does not reach you, in every way, physical, psychological and emotional. Make an intimate reform to heal yourself from that moment, align your chakras, which are all shaken at this moment. These chakras that I talked about here in this post are the ones that we should be very, very careful for interfering with our emotional, and as I said in my post about self-love, many of the diseases we see today are caused by the emotional.
When this area of ​​our lives is out of balance, we are vulnerable to toxic situations and people, because our guard is down, our vibration too, remembering that like attracts like. If I keep vibrating with negative feelings, I only attract negative things. It's not a question of guilt, villain and victim. It's a matter of taking responsibility for yourself, your life, of keeping in mind that your life depends on you, of not giving that great power to those who don't have that power. The power of control of your life is with yourself, victim can't do anything, I had already said this in my previous column.
I'm not saying that those who have self-love, who take care of their spiritual part, vibrational energy don't go through that, because they go through situations that take them off the axis. The issue is the permission you give to be in that kind of situation, the permission you are given for someone to treat you like that, the length of time you stay in that kind of relationship.
If you are going through one-sided or abusive relationships, get out of it, don't let this situation snowball and be something that is difficult to get around. I know it hurts to walk away from the person, you love, you feel dependent, your emotional, psychological is all destroyed, I understand, I really understand, but you have to be strong, you have to put yourself first in these situations. It's literally either you or him/her. Choose yourself, take care of yourself, that's enough of these situations, and put in your mind "I don't deserve crumbs, I deserve the best". Stay away from these people, no matter who it is, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, mother, father, brother, sister, children, friends, anyone, because yes, these types of relationships can happen not only between couples, there are relationships abuse between friends, parents and children.
Anyway, put a stop to these abusive people, who don't add you, who don't treat you with reciprocity, because you deserve something better in your life, cut your relationship with them, don't let them affect you. Move away, don't try to change them, help them, because no one changes anyone. The person may come to you with a sad story that they have old traumas, which doesn't justify taking it out on others. Let her resolve with herself, even seek some therapy to work on this aspect of life, but don't try to play the hero, the heroine. Don't throw away your psychological, emotional and spiritual health because of someone, this is decreeing your own destruction little by little and when you least realize it, you are not only emotionally, psychologically and spiritually shaken, but also your physical. We all have things that are not so pleasant in life that we have to deal with, but we have to try to deal with it and not take it out on the world, so that our lives walk and don't stagnate.
So, work on your self-love, align yourself with the universe, take this situation as a learning for life, so that you wake up to yourself, to take care of yourself more and that when the slightest indication that this relationship is a trap, get out of it.
When the emotional is no longer cool, the chakras out of alignment, your vibrational energy down there, you end up attracting all kinds of bad things in life.
This is quantum physics. Nobody wants to go through this, but in the subconscious, they don't think they deserve good things in life, that it's not enough, that it's "garbage", because nowadays there is a glamorization of suffering, of those who are more screwed in life, comfort in this type of situation. I would really like to know how suffering, being screwed in life, could be something good enough to be celebrated.
Then these same people want to prosper, not only financially, but in relationships, personally as well. I'm sorry, but with these thoughts, you're not going to conquer these things. Desperation won't help either.
There is this desperation, the demand to date, get married as soon as possible, which is embarrassing, worthy of a pity to go out alone, to do things on our own, that we have to always be surrounded by people and there are some who can't even stay in their own company , remain in this emotional dependence.
If not, it's not shameful or shameful for you to go out alone, to do the things you want to do on your own, to not be surrounded by people 24 hours a day. When you go out alone, you do the things you want to do on your own, it demonstrates your independence and that you feel good about yourself.
We are not an island, we do not live in this life alone, we are always accompanied, whether we are known people or not, so remove the “I am alone in life”, because we are not alone in this world, we just cannot depend on it to live, leave the house, do the things we feel like, for example: going to the movies, the mall, a park, party, travel…
Not forgetting to mention that nobody is surrounded by people 24 hours a day, not even celebrities, because we all have our lives, our tasks, we cannot want to be surrounded by people all the time.
About dating and marriage, it should not be seen as a purpose in life, a goal, but as consequences.
It's not because you're not dating or married to someone that your life has lost its meaning. It may not be something you want and it's okay not to want to date or marry, but it may also be something you, like me, want, but aren't desperate enough to accept the first person that comes along.
We have to take this emotional dependence away from us, to put the power over our lives in the hands of the other, to put this pressure on the other so that he makes us happy, that makes his life happen, this leaves a very heavy relationship, we suffocate, We hold each other while we suffocate and hold the other, so you will only get frustrated with anyone you relate to and even end up falling into a one-sided or abusive relationship because your criteria are too low.
You loving yourself, working your vibrational energy through quantum physics, uniting positive thoughts + positive feelings + positive actions to attract positive things from the universe, the alignment of the chakras, the probability of achieving goals, of having a full life will be much greater . No one came to complete the other, complete we already are. We are here in each other's lives to complement, to overflow what is already in us, love, light, peace, happiness and prosperity. Simply someone who adds to our lives, right?Thank you for reading this article! Much light, much peace and love in your life, namaste.
