The idea circulates on social media that walking away is an interesting strategy – and, perhaps, infallible – to be missed and, therefore, to make the other realize their value. It is common to find tips in this regard in videos and texts titled “Learn to be missed”, “Make him run after you” etc.
There is, of course, a certain logic in this, since it is in the human order not to attribute value to what is too available. And if consciousness is born of contrast, it is not surprising that we realize the importance of a person only when he moves away.
Let's also agree that everything in this existence seeks balance, and relationships are no exception to this rule, so if one is giving too much, it is natural for the other to back off and deliver less of themselves. So ok, there is some logic in that philosophy, but…
As much as there is a basis for ideas like this, I consider them inadvisable and even dangerous if seen from another angle. In real and adult life, when we don't have time and mood for seduction games, we want someone who values ​​us for the cards we put on the table. Someone mature enough to love us without us having to convince them, forcing recognition through cheap games.
If it's given that someone doesn't want us, it seems healthy for us to leave the scene not to be missed, but to actually move away from that context in which we are not loved. Ask yourself: is this what you want? Someone you need to walk away from to gain recognition? Wouldn't it be a case of working on your self-esteem, your self-love and going in search of someone who really wants you, without games?
Furthermore, adopting such a “foolproof strategy” can be frustrating when, instead of “missing it”, you simply fall into total oblivion, thus having the confirmation that the other simply does not care.
Walking away from someone who doesn't value you in order to "miss you" is walking away for the wrong reasons. Walk away, yes, but to leave in search of the love, respect and recognition you deserve. Move away not to attract the other, but to bring back your love for yourself.
So stay tuned, because if you need to make an effort to get attention, it's not worth it. If you need to do the work destined for two in the relationship, it's not worth it. If you need to apply the relationship coach's tips or “walk away so he'll miss you”, it's definitely not worth it. If you need to insist, ask, fight, juggle, get out, because it's not worth it.
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It's just that relationship is about surrender, not about fighting. It is about lightness and reciprocity, not about effort and unilateral investment that ends up becoming begging. It's about loving... loving without games and without reservations...
