These decisions that we end up making, substituting simple pleasures for these compulsions, end up making our day to day more difficult and heavy, because we decrease the value. It's as if the simple things to live don't have the same value and, consequently, these compulsions increase even more in our day.
Now, as the Emotional intelligence can help us to lessen these compulsions?
There is a psychiatric diagnosis, which tells us that compulsions are the fourth most frequent in the world population. They are classified by specific habits that repeat, even when they bring complications to health or family and even personal life.
From my experience and also from several cases clarified on the internet, the food becomes much more than a source of nutrition. It ends up becoming an addiction, perhaps even worse than a drug, because, in addition to being more accessible, it is something vital, bringing us the idea that we are just nourishing our body.
The pleasure generated by food ends up working as a mechanism to fill this emotional void, in which they often, and unconsciously, associate food as their refuge, their safe haven.
But of course there is not only the compulsion for food, there are several other types, such as addiction to sex, work (workaholics), drinking, shopping, in short, many others making up an extensive list of disorders.
Usually, compulsive people feel enormous relief, almost immediately, at the first moment they give in to compulsion, but soon end up feeling guilty and even ashamed, because there is a conscience behind it.
Through Emotional Intelligence, we can help ourselves, and the first step is to Self perception. Start noticing which moments you end up losing control of, what you feel and how you feel after giving in. Try to find out what the emotional trigger is that is leading you to the feeling. For example, some people who get very nervous, and find themselves in the midst of a moment of pressure and/or stress, turn to sweets to give them a momentary “calm”.
When you start to identify these patterns, you begin to have the possibility and opportunity to create new rituals at the exact times, looking for healthier alternatives to meet this emotional need that is leading you to compulsion.
Based on this knowledge you have just gained, begin to Include healthy activities in your routine. You don't have to run a marathon the next day, maybe you haven't exercised in a long time. The important thing is to start, so set up a strategy so that, little by little, you start to introduce this new habit into your life. Also look for other ways that give you pleasure, such as studying something that interests you, reading a book, meeting friends more often, in short, seeking those healthy pleasures as alternatives.
Another very important point, which is the basis of Emotional Intelligence, is learn to deal with your feelings and emotions, perceiving and directing them in a conscious and healthy way. In this way, you will no longer discount the emotional imbalance in any type of compulsion. It is extremely important to understand your emotions and how they work, how they are activated and then look for alternatives to relieve internal pressure. Acting in this way, your emotions are no longer your biggest enemy (self-sabotage), and start to act as your ally in everyday life.
Another suggestion to be added is seek the Systemic Family Constellation, because it will clearly show the cause of these compulsions, that is, it will show what is behind the emotion that leads you to the compulsion and, thus, you will be able to work quickly and efficiently.
From my experience and experience with Family Constellations and Coaching - more than 15 years working with people and their emotions -, when they are really willing to look at the problem and apply a new discipline in life, in a short time, they get rid of this bad. But remember: there is no magic solution, but willpower and commitment to your life.
I hope this article has helped you and from here you can have a freer life.
A big hug in the heart of each of you.
