What is freedom? It is one of the things that human beings most value and seek in life. To be free… Do everything we want? This is the first obstacle that the human being comes up against at some point in life.
There is a time to learn about freedom and decide if you really want to be free.
Do you know when there is food proof at the supermarket (or when there was, before the world pandemic)? We could taste certain food that, if it was really good and had a good price, would be placed in the cart. With freedom it is very similar, with the difference that it is not a product, but an opportunity.
It proves not a little bit, but a great deal of this opportunity. It's delicious, and the desire is for more, and the human being wants more time to decide if he really wants to be free. But isn't being free simple? — many think. The moment of decision arrives, within that opportunity, to say no, even when everything is allowed.
Monja Coen, in the video on her channel, uses the phrase of Saint Augustine that “freedom is to do even what you would not like to do”, to bring the reflection that the freedom we have is that of choice, that being The human being is free to choose, not only what he thinks is good in the present moment, but what is best for him. Check out the video below:
Freedom to say no or genuine freedom
When making a choice, human beings analyze what consequences this choice will have and whether, even in the face of consequences, it is the best decision for their well-being.
This freedom to say no to certain whims, certain impulses, certain 'present pleasures' is what makes freedom such a great paradox for so many people.
Being free requires the courage to often renounce everything that is recognized as pleasurable and “good”, but which consequently can have unpleasant consequences.
The search for balance, something so utopian for so many people, is one of the indispensable ingredients in the exercise of freedom. The map and compass are in the hands, and the person needs to consciously decide on his own paths, what is best for his development.
When you are a child, parents or caregivers are always saying no! and this NO! Its purpose is to protect and support the healthy development of the child. If everything was allowed, if all the rules could be broken, the result would be chaotic.
The complexity is that the person, after being an adult and apparently conscious, needs to deny himself, bring up the role of his caregivers in childhood, that is, self-care is in the freedom to say no. And the person does not deny himself once, but several times, and if you stop to think, you will see that these choices are from the smallest to the most difficult.
Can you just imagine having to decide to deny yourself something that is linked almost entirely to the emotional? It will be necessary to resort to such a force of rationality to be able to stop oneself in the face of impulsive action. Very complex? Perhaps, but it is the exercise of being free.
The human being needs to say no in delicate moments. For important advances in your existence, you will need to exercise your freedom to say no. It will be necessary to be firm with oneself and rethink whether, after all, human freedom has been exercised in a healthy way, taking into account one's physical and mental well-being.
And this is not himself, he is turned to his own whims, to his own impulsive actions, to what is considered pleasurable in the short term, but which is a reflection of an inner weakness and lack of knowledge.
Personally, I often had to deny my own desires, what I thought was the best, because in many moments we seek to anesthetize ourselves in the face of a necessary inner transformation through small doses of pleasures. We want to sabotage ourselves, cut the path, do some zigzag, as if there are no consequences, but they come.
The freedom to say cannot represent something more thorny for some people than for others, but despite the pain, the thorns, the difficulty in denying many wills, the consequence is well-being, it is true autonomy over oneself and about their own emotions.
We can't be free mentally imprisoned
There is a quote by the poet Rumi that says, “Why do you stay in prison when the door is wide open?” and this is a situation that many people experience. I even tried it on many occasions.
This question was addressed to someone in a condition of freedom, but who was kept in prison by their own choice, that is, the question is for those who are exercising their freedom to say no to their own autonomy.
What leads someone to reject the possibility of autonomy? Perhaps it is because, in prison, the person feels comfortable and safe, while, in the condition of freedom and autonomy, he will have to deal with who he is, with the vulnerabilities based on his condition of freedom.
Feeling free is much more related to how a person feels emotionally and mentally. The search for self-knowledge, the search for breaking harmful behavioral patterns is fundamental for human beings to be able to exercise their autonomy and freedom of choice.
Do you tend to act impulsively or, when faced with a situation, are you able to analyze it for your well-being, even if it means having to say no to yourself?
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Renunciation is essential for advancement at various times in life. The insistence on something that is not possible or that is not developing positively can lead to the involution of life itself, that is, it is as if life stopped, not developing for new positive harvests. Do you know when it's time to resign? More than that: are you willing, in the process of choosing, to lose some things for your well-being and development?
Deny more of your own wills in the present, learning to analyze the context of your own life in a critical way, valuing, not for moments of well-being, but for genuine well-being, the one that will help your self-development. Exercise your freedom to say no… to yourself.
