38 lessons in 38 years
1. Always beat your pride to apologize. Being too proud to apologize is always a bad thing—your relationships suffer for nothing.
2. Our goods are more than useless, they are harmful. They add no value to your life and cost you everything. Not just the money, but the time you spend buying, preserving, worrying, tidying, etc.
3. Take it easy. Running hardly solves. Life is best enjoyed when lived at a good pace.
4. Goals are not as important as we think. Try to live without them for a week. Take a chance, you can do amazing things without having goals, and you don't have to control them — which cuts down on bureaucracy in your life. You are less stressed without goals, and you are free to choose which path to take without them.
5. Moment is all there is. All our worries and plans about the future, all the events that are in the past, are in our heads and distract us, preventing us from living in the now. Put all that aside and focus on what you need to do in the present. In this way, any activity can be a meditation.
6. When your children ask for your attention, give it. Give your child your undivided attention instead of getting bored with constant interruptions. Be grateful that you can spend time with the ones you love.
7. Don't get into debt. This includes debts on the card, student life, home and personal charges. We think they are necessary, but they are not. They end up causing more headaches than they are worth, can ruin our lives, and cost far more than we can afford. Spend less than you earn, keep going until you have money.
8. It's okay not to be "the cool", "the popular". In our youth, we spend a lot of time wanting to look cool in the eyes of others, and even then, we still don't know how cool it is to be yourself.
9. The only marketing you need is an awesome product. If it's good, people will share that fact for you. Every other type of marketing is fake.
10. Never send an email or message that is inappropriate in the eyes of the world. In this digital age, you never know what to expect from the public eye.
11. You can't motivate people. The most you can do is inspire them with your actions. People who think they can use behavioral “science” or management techniques haven't spent enough time observing others.
12. If you find yourself swimming with all the other fish, go the other way. They also don't know where they are going.
13. You're going to lose a lot, but that's okay. We are so preoccupied with experiencing everything, not missing anything important, that we forget the simple fact that we cannot live everything. This physical reality says that we are going to miss many things. We can't read all the good books, watch all the good movies, meet all the great people. But the secret is: life is better when we don't try to do everything. Learn to enjoy the side of life you experience and it will turn everything into a wonder.
14. Mistakes are the best form of learning. Don't be afraid to make them. Also try not to make the same mistakes more than once.
15. Failures are the stepping stones to success. Without fail, we will never learn how to be successful. So instead of avoiding this process out of fear, try to fail.
16. Rest is more important than you think. People work too hard, forget to rest, and then come to hate their jobs. In practice, you see this constantly: people training for a marathon, getting burned for not giving their muscles and joints time to recover. People who overwork themselves, not understanding that resting is where their bodies get stronger, always end up more stressed.
17. There are few joys like a good book, a good walk, a good hug, or a good friend. And all of them are free.
18. We don't stay fit overnight. This is a long process and one that provides a lot of learning.
19. Destiny is only part of the journey. We get so worried about our goals, our future, that we miss great things along the way. If you obsess over a goal, you're not going to enjoy it when you finally get there. You will be scared about your next step, or your next destination.
20. A good walk cures most problems. Want to lose weight and get healthy? walk. Want to enjoy life and spend less? walk. Want to cure stress and clear your head? walk. Want to meditate and live in the moment? walk. Facing any problems in your personal or work life? Walk, your head will clear out.
21. Let go of expectations. When you create expectations about something—a person, experience, vacation, job, book—you put everything in a box that has nothing to do with reality. You idealize something (or a person) and then try to shape reality to that ideal, and you often end up disappointed. Instead, live reality as it is, appreciate it and be happy that it is as it is.
22. Giving is much better than receiving. Giving without any expectations, without expecting anything in return, is a beautiful and pure act. We often give something and expect something in return—at least be grateful or acknowledge their efforts. Try to let go of what you need and just surrender.
23. Competition is rarely as useful as cooperation. Our society is geared towards competition — ripping each other's throats out and surviving who is the fittest. But human beings are meant to work together for the survival of the tribe, and to co-operate with our resources to allow each one to contribute what he can. This requires a skill set effort from other people, but it is something that is very much worth it.
24. Gratitude is one of the best ways to find happiness. We are often unhappy about our lives, we crave more because we don't realize how much we already have. Instead of focusing on what you don't have, be grateful for the incredible blessings you've been given: your loved ones and the simple pleasures, your health, music, sight, books, nature, beauty and the ability to create. , etc. Be grateful everyday.
25. Compassion for the lives of others is more than pleasure. Many people scoff at vegetarianism because they love the taste of meat and cheese so much, but they are putting their pleasures above the sufferings of other beings. You can be perfectly healthy on a vegetarian (or even vegan) diet. Thus, killing and torturing animals is absolutely unnecessary. Compassion is a much more fulfilling way to live life than turning a blind eye to suffering.
26. Our tastes change. The biggest proof of this is in our taste. So don't be afraid to experiment.
27. Create. The world is full of distractions, but few are as important as creation.
28. Invest in new perspectives. Usually when we are very worried it is because we have lost our perspective. In a broader scope, this problem means almost nothing. This battle that we are having with another person is something that doesn't matter at all. Let it go and move on.
29. Don't spend too much time sitting. It can kill you. Move, dance, run, play.
30. Use compound interest magic. Invest early and it will grow like alchemy. Live on little, don't have debt, save what you can, invest in mutual funds and watch your money grow.
31. We are all educated in choice, and we all see in the media (news, movies, books, magazines, the Internet) that there is a worldview that we are destined to conform to. Discover this worldview and question it. Ask if there are alternatives and investigate them. Tip: Companies have a big influence on our research sources.
32. Learn the art of empathy. We often judge others without having enough information. We should try to understand them, put ourselves in their shoes, and begin to assume that others do what they do for a good reason, if we understand what they are going through. Life gets much better once we learn this art.
33. Do less. Many people try to do too much. They fill their lives with checklists and try to eliminate each one as if they were machines. Get rid of those lists and find out what's really important. Stop being a machine and focus on what you love. Do it with love.
34. No parent knows what they are doing. We all fake it and hope we're getting it right. Some people focus on the details and miss the fun. I just try not to confuse them too much, show them that they are loved, enjoy the moments I can be together, show them that life is fun, and ask them to go the way they want to become the amazing people they want to be. That they already are.
35. Love comes in many forms, but the purest is in knowing how to love each one with its qualities and defects.
36. Life is a breath. You may feel like you have a lot of time, but it goes by faster than you think. Your children grow up in the blink of an eye. Gray hair grows before you even finish making your life. So, enjoy every moment.
37. Fear will try to stop you. Doubts will try to stop you. You will be shy to do great things, venture into new worlds, create something new, all because of fear and doubts. It will happen in the back of your mind, where you are barely aware that there is any activity. Get rid of those feelings. Shine a light on them. Hit them, cut them. Do it anyway, because whatever they tell you, they're wrong.
38. We have a lot to learn, we often know that, in fact, everything we know is wrong, especially in this information age where everything changes every second. Don't be afraid to learn.
Take our tips with you, but remember that certain things can only be learned by living. We wish you the best of luck on your journey to 38, but regardless, if you've learned any lessons we haven't covered, let us know in the comments! After all, cultivating wisdom is always the best way.
Text written by Amanda Magliaro from the Eu Sem Fronteiras Team.
