For some time now I have been paying attention to the way people behave towards themselves. I realize that there is a great concern to show others something different from what they really are.
There are many reasons that lead a person to act or “characterize” themselves as someone they admire. One of the reasons I would like to address is linked to the need for acceptance that we have, the enormous need to please everyone and everything. The question that remains is: will it be possible to please everyone or is this a great illusion? And sooner or later we end up frustrated with the discovery of reality.
Non-compliance with who we are and what we have makes us wear masks that represent us in different situations and, according to the masks used, we hope to receive the recognition that will fulfill our expectations. Every time we act as others expect, contrary to our essence, we are delaying our own evolution. It is important to understand that masks are necessary in our lives, as the different environments we frequent require behavior that is consistent with the situation. For example: work environment, religious, family, affective, among others. However, what can cause conflict is not this suitability, but the fact that we wear the masks to be seen as perfect, adequate, cool, intelligent people, so we will receive a lot of applause and we will have a high level of acceptance.
Idealization, which is illusory and unreal, can bring great suffering, as we create expectations that the other will make us happy, give us security, praise us and fill the needs that we often don't even think we have. They are expressed desires of the unconscious. As we live waiting for all these wishes to come true, we don't see real life passing by. And when we realize that, disappointment comes to haunt us.
Because in this way we are accomplishing what our unconscious desires, we just don't know it.
According to Carl G. Jung: “Until you become conscious, the unconscious will direct your life, and you will call it destiny”. Therefore, the more we know ourselves and understand our purpose in life, the less we will need masks that hide our essence to show who we are not to please anyone!
I would like to close with a sentence by La Rochefoucauld, Prince of Marillac – Paris – XNUMXth century, in the book La Fontaine and Human Behavior:
“We are so used to disguising ourselves to others that we end up disguising ourselves to ourselves.”
May this sentence serve as an inspiration for the knowledge of ourselves, for that internal journey that we proposed to do in the first article, “Psychology of Human Relationship”. Self-knowledge is always worth it!
