“Psychological life can be considered as the continuous polarization and tension of different tendencies and functions, and also as a constant effort, conscious or not, to establish balance.” Roberto Assagioli, Italian psychiatrist, creator of psychosynthesis. Self-knowledge is a beautiful teaching of one of the oldest philosophers, Socrates: “Know thyself”.
Who am I? The answer to this question represents the development of self-awareness through self-observation, recognition, acceptance and harmonization of your own feelings, your light and shadow, the body. It is knowing your thoughts and seeking the meaning and meaning of your own existence in order to direct it.
What are the thoughts that govern and motivate your actions?
It is through self-knowledge that we find the ability and the possibility of realizing our dreams.
It is the possibility to stop being led by thoughts of incapacity, pessimism, feelings of worthlessness, rejection, victimism and to assume the power that has always been granted to us – the power of choice. We attract everything with which we identify.
The truth is that we know each other very little. But why? We usually lose our frame of reference and become more attached to the external frame of reference. In this way, we let ourselves be influenced by appearances, possessions, people, media and “prophets” because we are incessantly looking for answers, a path, a path to follow, a port to arrive. Deluded and often manipulated. Until we discover, to our surprise, that the answers have always been in the same place: inside us!
And the others? They are facilitators, mirrors from which we constantly learn. We see ourselves through and with the help of the other, through relationships, through sharing.
People who develop self-power, through better knowledge and understanding of themselves, they can attract and conquer what they want, taking responsibility, the consequences and enjoying the bonuses, because they know what they want and outline plans and goals to achieve them. What do you really want?
We need to pay attention to what happens inside and outside of us, in our work environment, in our home. Who am I in the various environments in which I move? Who am I with each person I have a relationship with? Who am I when I'm in prayer? Who am I in nature? Who am I when I'm alone? At the wheel?
As we approach ourselves, respecting who we are, our limits, giving importance to our dreams, realizing our goals and seeking to meet our needs, we learn to like ourselves more and to recognize that the other is also deserving and has rights, establishing more ethical, assertive and goodwill relationships.
There are several ways to go this route.
It's inevitable. Surprising. It's an adventure!
It is a simple contribution to the search for oneself, this search that makes us brothers, accomplices and collaborators in the evolutionary process of humanity.
It's the path we're all looking for, the safe harbor, the target to hit. We look outside until we discover that it is inside. But we need each other to find this way.
We learn about ourselves when we interact with others and observe our behavior in relationships. We don't learn when we criticize or judge the other, instead of looking at ourselves.
Why is it that some people are assertive at work and passive at home? What happens internally with this person when he is relating at work and at home?
Awareness of one's own behavior and the origin of such behavior are the first steps towards better understanding.
The next step is to recognize and admit your own behavior, the consequences of attitudes and your way of thinking and feeling.
It is experiencing the pain of disappointment, of disregard for oneself, of self-abandonment. The omission, the giving up, the fear that paralyzed, the anger and the dependence that led to self-destructive attitudes.
Perhaps there is regret for the way you have treated others. Perhaps there is sadness in the way you have been allowing yourself to be treated.
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It is to face all this not as defeat, guilt or demand, but as a movement towards the future and transformation. It's leaving behind the baggage of the past. It's learning to do differently.
The past should not be denied, but seen as part of learning and experience. It should serve as a warning sign to avoid future repetitions.
This is no time for complaining, discouragement, judgment and punishment. No martyrdom and drama. It is time to reach the understanding that our life, at this moment, is the result of what we have been feeling, thinking and doing for a long time.
It is to see it as an opportunity to move forward, transforming what is necessary so that we can achieve better results.
It takes courage and faith to come out of denial and take responsibility for the situation in which our life finds itself.
At the same time, this recognition fills us with strength and a feeling of liberation. “If I am responsible, then I can change direction.” This is our power!
By believing that life is a sacrifice and that everything is difficult, you only attract sacrifices and difficulties. Life is true to our thoughts. Change your thoughts so that you can change your life.
What happens is that we often don't know our thoughts. We don't know what beliefs are governing and directing our lives.
Observe his speeches: “It's always like this, everything is difficult for me”; “It's always the same thing, people don't listen to me”; “It's no use, it won't work at all”; “He/she won't like me because I'm not interesting”; “Everything is very difficult, complicated”; “Everything is getting worse every day”; “Life is chaos”; “My little life is as usual”; "There's no way"; “This is not for me”…
What do you deserve? Before answering, take a deep breath. Go beyond the clichés “I deserve the best” or “I deserve all the best”. Take a few more deep breaths, silence your mind and let the answer come.
If you truly believe, with conviction, that you deserve the best, you will get the best. If in some area of ​​your life the best is not happening, it may be that you are believing in something else or that you are not clear and determined about what you really want. The essential for change to occur is commitment to yourself.
Therapy is one of the ways that can facilitate this process. Seeking therapy is not a sign of weakness or inability to resolve your problems, as many still sadly believe.
Doing therapy means working with someone who is able to help you clarify the nature and meaning of your actions, thoughts, and feelings. It means developing a relationship in which it is possible to speak and feel without fear of criticism and judgment. It means being in a relationship where there is no need to play roles or be who you are not, other than being accepted as you are.
Therapy is a process through which we learn more about ourselves through reflection, exercise, meditation and dialogue that leads us to the reservoir of answers: our interior, where our wisdom resides.
It is to rescue the joy of the reunion with yourself.
It's being good with yourself and with life!
