Having addressed the narcissist's modus operandi, which we have talked about throughout this series, it remains now to explore the other side of this coin, that is: the different reactions of the "flies" that fall into his web, something very little addressed in the texts that deal with the subject and that do not always describe the drama, taken to the victims involved in this complex relationship, in all its physical, mental, social and legal consequences.
In this episode, we will deal with those that arise where the narcissist develops his professional activities. With regard specifically to this environment, what the diagnostic manual for mental health disorders tells us is that psychopaths tend to be, with some frequency, possessors of brilliant minds, which means that their areas of expertise can be as different as possible.
However, depending on the type of disorder they exhibit, their intelligence would be subject to the typical characteristics of that profile. Psychopaths with narcissistic traits, for example, tend to think they are smarter than they really are. This understanding is important for the approach to this episode.
If it is true that psychopaths reveal higher than normal intelligence levels, this is not quite the case with the narcissist, who is more likely to overestimate his intellectual capacity, as he usually makes gross mistakes that compromise him in front of his “audience”.
We could start with what results in their greatest vulnerability, which is also the most present characteristic of their profile: they hate to put in effort to get what they want, hence the option always for the easy way out. This is not restricted to its modus operandi with victims, but covers all other areas of activity, from a very early age.
Because they are too confident in their ability to seduce to have access to everything they want, they usually do not strive to reach an effective level of qualification, limiting themselves only to what they want to show off, as they are too short-sighted and greedy for the period necessary to a good training. They will always find that their power of seduction saves them from further efforts, as they will find many people willing to do anything for them.
In this regard, they end up distancing themselves from this much more demanding current market, which demands competence and technical knowledge at increasingly higher levels. It remains for them to appeal to activities that do not require much more than what they already have, that is: those skills that they know how to exploit well when weaving webs around their “flies”.
In the specific case of the narcissist, one of these careers is, for example, the sales area, in which they manage to do relatively well, due to the salesperson profile approaching their “natural inclinations”: the power of seduction to attract the customer in a sales process, and that type of bond that, despite being superficial, conveys the image of a reliable relationship that “puts its customer as a priority”.
The salesperson is also required to have a good presentation, be convincing and be skilled with speech, in order to impress a potential customer.
It is also desirable for the profile to be able to convey a positive and friendly message, in order to obtain customer loyalty in its approaches, even if such loyalty is not reciprocal. These things are what the narcissist loves to do most when in contact with his victims.
The narcissistic salesperson would be the perfect professional, within their area of expertise, were it not for an excessive and insatiable ambition, which does not keep them within the role entrusted to them, since they are always aiming to go beyond everything they have already achieved.
If you have autonomy, then, not to be closely monitored, you can climb several steps, quickly reaching the different stages of the role, and even go from ordinary salesperson to team leader, in a short period of time. And we already know that circumventing surveillance systems is something in which the narcissist proves to be an expert, without which he would not be able to live the different roles of his ambiguous life.
However, not everything is rosy for the narcissist in his work environment, starting with the fact that his insidious behavior needs to be “upgraded”, so as not to expose himself to so many people who communicate all the time. This will then be the first adaptation he will need to make, as soon as he finds himself frequenting an environment shared with a significant number of people.
But, if there is an especially vast and diverse field of flies for our spider, this is the work environment, where it will be able to choose its victims among many that are ready to serve its most different purposes.
Due to so many possibilities presented to him in the professional space, this theme alone would provide the subject for countless episodes of our series, if we wished to. In this one, in particular, we are going to get to know the first of these “flies” and the impact that it has over the entire period of living with this cunning spider, in a place where its web-spinning capacity is practically unlimited.
The spider's repertoire will never be restricted to the moment of construction of the web, as we know, but, in the professional environment, it will be demanded an extra dose of attention. If the concentration of many potential victims in the same environment offers strategic advantages, in many ways, on the other hand, it will also demand more caution from the spider, so that its plans do not get out of its control, since many eyes will be on it.
While, in a private environment, it is much more difficult for the fly to observe the spider's movement, at work this difficulty is practically non-existent, and an attentive observer may even create situations for the narcissist to expose himself, if he notices something strange. But don't think of this as an impediment for the narcissist to use his "snake charmer" ability to present himself as every boss's "dream employee", until he is faced with the problems that will inevitably occur.
Traditionally, the narcissist's initial victims in the workplace do not arise from among colleagues, but among superiors, such as the team supervisor or their sales manager. This is because proximity makes these “flies” perceive a gradual change in behavior and become threats to their performance, as soon as the narcissist takes over the environment, after being hired — when he made use of a whole arsenal of seduction to get the spot.
Thus, it may not take long for the candidate, apparently capable, captivating and easy to get along with during the selection process, to show a diametrically opposite side of what was expected in the months that follow. As it is less often that work relationships present significant emotional ties, the observer will usually not be as involved with the narcissist's seductive side, which allows him to maintain a more critical view of reality. He is then able to perceive, in a clearer way, the difference between the “before” and the “after” happening in a relatively short period, and this, logically, will make him even more attentive, in order to understand the reason for the change. .
At the beginning, one thing that catches the eye is the speed with which the narcissist is becoming more and more “spacious”, to the point of driving himself, in the workplace, as if everything he has access to (due to his role) was to be turning into private property. He will no longer make a distinction between what is available for use at work and the things he has in his private life.
You will easily switch to using your corporate cell phone on weekends to save on your own device bill; use the company car on private tours; or even introduce yourself to clients and friends as a “sales manager”, when your position does not go beyond that of a regular salesperson.
It is also common for the direct superior to discover several lies that he tells outsiders, in order to receive different treatment, or even “stunts” armed with equally dishonest clients, which can bring profits to both, such as contracts that divert values to their employees. pockets.
The corporate environment, due to its complexity, allows, with relative ease, the use of actions that take advantages to malicious people, through shady expedients. It is not difficult for the narcissist, therefore, to find opportunities to fulfill many of his desires through these maneuvers, with the risk of later blowing up in the head of a hierarchical superior, putting him in a bad spot in the direction, or even having to answer criminally for the losses.
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These are just some of the problems that this first “corporate fly” may encounter before discovering, for himself, the stupidity he did, by allowing himself to be seduced by the narcissist, until turning him into his “trusted man”. Subsequently, others will come, as long as he is not restrained by an act of such gravity that culminates in his dismissal for just cause.
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