Only those who have one or more pets, regardless of species or breed, can understand the joy they bring to our lives and to our daily lives, which can often be troubled or stressful. The love that a pet parent feels is indescribable and pure. Cat, dog, parrot, hamster, fish… any animal can have a unique connection with its owner and bring peace to a home. According to data from the National Health Survey, carried out by the IBGE, 44,3% of Spanish homes have at least one dog, which makes it clear how much we like having an animal with us.
Just as having a pet is extremely beneficial for us humans, losing a life partner is also harmful to the same degree. The feeling of emptiness is very great and the death of a pet can even cause depression. There are psychologists who guarantee that losing your pet can equal the pain of losing a close family member, like losing a child or brother: grief can last days, months and even years. People around you should respect and take seriously those who are grieving a pet. Even if these people have not had the contact and relationship that the owner had with the animal, it is necessary to be empathetic and put yourself in his place at these moments.
A Naya, the little dog who was a faithful squire Marcela Ela, from Guarulhos, SP, slept with the owner for six years and, after her sudden death, it was not easy to get over: “(…) I know this is strange, but I feel that I only survived high school because I had her. She died suddenly, went to look for me and fell dead on my feet (I believe she wanted to say goodbye)… And it destroyed me so much that I only managed to sleep well after a year. (…) It's still strange to this day that my room is empty and she doesn't have her watching the street through the window. She died the year before last (2017) and to this day I miss her”, says Marcela.
Even if we spend years and years with them, it is necessary to keep in mind that one day they will leave and that this can happen as a result of some disease, complication or even natural aging, taking into account that cats, for example, have expectations 2 and 16 years old and dogs 10 to 13 years old, while the average for humans is to live up to 79 years old. In other words, unfortunately, it is not possible for our pet to accompany us all our lives. Many people would rather live with animals than with other people, and they shouldn't be martyred for that; pets offer love, support, loyalty and comfort, while every day humanity disappoints us more and more. So when the animal dies, the owner feels as if he has lost one of the most special relationships in his life, and that's exactly what happens.
“I held her during her first vaccination, I gave her her first bath, I took her first tooth, I took her the first time for a walk, to poop outside, I taught her to pee in the right place, to lie down, sit and roll over. . To be patient (at least, most of the time). I did everything and gave everything I could give her. All the hugs, caresses, kisses and smells, and she gave me double everything – including bites when giving the medicine –, but I never cared”, says Placido Possam, from São Paulo, capital. For him, the way to get over not having his dog Leona anymore was to believe that she is in a better place and that he will find her again: “I know she is alive and waiting for me, without any suffering. I am absolutely sure of that, and no one is going to prove me wrong,” he adds.
Looking from this perspective, those who do not have a pet can better understand the grief of those who have lost a pet. It is even becoming increasingly common to organize funerals and burials for animals, in the same way that these ceremonies are performed for humans. And it's okay for the owner if he wants to say goodbye that way! This is a very delicate moment and it may be necessary. However, there is one point that you must pay close attention to: if, in the process of mourning, the owner has his routine interrupted because of death or presents symptoms of deeper psychological problems, looking for a professional, such as a psychologist, is always the best option. option to treat or avoid serious illnesses of the mind that can originate due to this loss.
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The death of an animal can influence the owner's physical and emotional health and, if he realizes that he has no support or understanding from those close to him, the owner tends to isolate himself, not vent, making the situation even worse. The routine, which used to have small - or large - tasks done for the pet or with it, needs to be completely modified after the loss, causing some habits to have to be "closed" from one hour to the next, generating anxiety and confusion, beyond sadness.
There are several accounts of owners who never really got over the death of their pet. Joice Marcelino, from Caieiras, SP, is one of the cases. She had the company of her husband for three years. hamster Hades and lost him in 2018. The owner left a touching statement for the pet on her Instagram, in gratitude for everything they went through together: “(…) now you will rest, because you fulfilled your function, gave me love and went to best little creature of my life, I love you so much Hades”, concluded Joice in her publication.
However, a few steps, or rather thoughts, can help to go through this grief in a less painful way: the owner should take the time that is necessary to express their sadness and deal with the loss. If you feel like crying, cry, don't repress the feeling. Not blaming yourself for what happened is a big step and perhaps one of the most difficult to understand, but if your pet died that is not your responsibility, try to reassure yourself and imagine that you did what you could to help him. Mariana Prignacca, from Lençóis Paulista, SP, tried to put this into her mind when she lost an animal: “(…) in the beginning it is very difficult. But I learned to think that I gave my best to my animals, and that their lives were good and happy, and that we have to learn that everything is fleeting in this life.” Like Mariana, all pet owners find it very difficult to accept death at first, but even so, it is necessary to be patient. Don't forget that you will have to resume your usual life, but don't forget to respect your pain.
Contrary to what many people think, especially those who don't have a pet, adopting another pet is not a good idea at first. It is necessary to understand that one animal will never replace the other, they are different, with different personalities, and the absence of the animal that died will continue to be felt. If the owner is not yet ready for a new life to be part of his home, he is likely to feel even sadder and not know how to interact or bond with the newly arrived animal. The person who has lost his companion must wait for the dust to settle, to think better about the question of having another pet and make the choice with an open heart.
Animals are living beings that teach us more good things than bad, if we can't say that they only teach good things, and they will always have a reserved space inside our heart. Years may pass, and we will continue to remember the good memories and moments they gave us, and this helps us to have a happier and more complete life. Blessed are all pets, who contribute so much to making our existence make sense in the world.
