Sometimes most people complain about their situation, but do nothing to change it.
We recommend the best professionals, we advise, we give examples of people who have outdone themselves, but the person always has a bigger excuse than the desire to change.
This happens for several factors, often unconscious, but I want to draw attention to a cause that I consider one of the biggest unconscious obstacles to the evolution of a person, which is the SECONDARY GAIN.
Yes, often the problem that the person complains about brings some benefit to him. For example: a person who gets sick and gets all the family's attention, we have, then, the family's attention as a secondary gain of his illness.
Another example, unemployed people who receive some kind of help. The help they receive is the secondary gain in question.
Obviously, sometimes the person you have no idea that this is influencing you.
There is a place for a very sincere examination of conscience to always ask yourself when faced with a problem: what prevents me from doing my part to change this situation?
The mind can provide a list of answers, but if none are concrete and consistent with reality, then the real cause may lie in the secondary gain..
Often a person needs the help of a therapist to identify what prevents them from making positive changes in their life. But it needs a lot of honesty and being open to hear the truth, because if the secondary gain is stronger, the subconscious will invent any excuse to keep the person away from therapeutic help.
That's why we say that only the truth sets you free. And that evolving is a Act of courage.
There is nothing more rewarding than being free from unconscious ties and being able to evolve in consciousness.
