Personal Power – Making friends and influencing people 🆙

By Anne Moon. Sao Paulo, March 16, 2020

Personal power. Winning friends and influencing people. It was a little uncomfortable to read those words, didn't it? It took you out of comfort for believing that having power and influencing people is something negative and bad. Am I right?

There are actually those who use this knowledge for negative things, to disguise a situation, who the person is, but in this article I want to focus on the positive points of having this knowledge for the improvement of personal and professional relationships, to act more intelligently in various situations and improve our communication.

The impression we pass on to others is very important, whether to increase our social cycle or to do business. The way we see ourselves is the way we will express ourselves to others, so it will determine the way they will treat us.

I'm going to tell you something that looks like a sign of the universe. Once, as I was writing this article, I was looking through the Instagram stories of a writer friend who is my mentor. In these stories, she answered questions that her followers left in that question box.

A follower asked why she's after power, if that's all she wants in life.

Look at the mindset that the person has: that power would be something negative and dangerous. This represents good common sense. There is even a very famous phrase, which says: “to get to know a human being well, give him power”.

Personal Power – Making friends and influencing people — Miguel Bruna / Unsplash

This sentence is correct, but there is a belief rooted in the collective unconscious that, if you give power to someone, he will necessarily bring chaos, and this will depend on the character of who has power.

I use my Dark Wings book series as an example. For those who still don't know, it talks about a power struggle between fallen and celestial angels, universal duality, a young daughter of an angel who ends up in the middle of it all and everyone's fate is in her hands. We have two female characters with great power: Cassidy, the protagonist, daughter of a very powerful angel, who ends up in the middle of this war that only she can put an end to; on the other side we have Sahariel, who antagonizes the protagonist and wants war for some reasons that I can't tell, otherwise I'll give spoilers. To understand this story, you will have to read the entire book. You can find the physical and ebook versions here.

What I want here is for you to notice these two characters. Cassidy, daughter of a fallen angel, and Sahariel, a heavenly angel. I didn't want to turn what should be "the good guy", in this case the angels of heaven, into villains, but in this series of books I wanted to show that this duality exists in the universe. I even talked about it in my yin-yang article. I wanted to include in this series of books that in everyday life in society there is no such classification of “villain” and “good guy”. It's a pretty obvious thing. It's easy to say that everyone is tired of knowing that society is not divided into good guys and bad guys, in black and white. In speech it is very obvious, but in the unconscious it is recorded and clear, so much so that with the same ease we label one person as “good” and another as “bad”. That is, we all go through a kind of “inspection”, whether we should be canceled or not, and we live in a minefield, being closely monitored if any attitude of ours was good or not to be exalted at the time or cancelled.

Anyway, coming back to the subject of the article: read the Dark Wings series. The first volume already exists. The second will be released soon, but only reading the first one already has the idea that the series calls into question, in addition to this duality of the universe, of having light and shadows (even on the cover of the book, purposely made that way). I believe I have already said this in a video of mine on my Facebook page (Author Anne Moon @realannemoon) or on Instagram (Anne Moon @ampeixotoo). In this story I also talk about power struggle and tyranny: how, of course, it can blind some people, if they don't know what to do with it all. It is equal to freedom: many know how to use it consciously, as well as others do not.

Power isn't necessarily about your finances or your social status, it's something deeper. It is self-knowledge to discover the dark side and the light side, to work with them and use them in the best way to succeed in personal and professional life. We are a product, not in the sense of objectification, dehumanization, but of placing a high value on ourselves, that thing of not selling yourself short and not accepting crumbs.

There's that much-spoken phrase, "be yourself", that can put some people in a tailspin. They have little or no certainty about who they are, perhaps because they've never analyzed themselves, gone on this journey of knowing themselves, or spent a lot of time projecting onto others something they weren't in essence.

In these cases, the person will have to make a process of returning to the inner child, the one who holds the essence. Realize that the child is pure, has no insecurities, fears, malice or hate. It's us adults who corrupt children with our personal issues, so we see children having attitudes that are usually adult.

Realize that, as a child, we seem to be practically unafraid. We play, we fall, we get hurt, we cry and we play again. We go on with life. When we argued with someone, we soon found a way to resolve it. We didn't harbor hate. We had dreams, goals in life. We used our creativity. We had no limiting beliefs. We believed that the limit was the size of the universe to what we could achieve in this life. We had this vitality, this desire to go after the things we wanted.

Over time, we lose out on hereditary beliefs, which over time put into us beliefs from the collective unconscious of the group and society in which we live. The media also collaborates with this. Let's shape ourselves to all this negative sphere that surrounds us.

So, we move away from who we are, we enter a causal amnesia. As I said in an article about self-love, we forget our essence, so much so that many people have this difficulty describing themselves or simply don't know how to do it.

This is where the quest for your personal power comes in. It's self-knowledge. When we get to that point of being in causal amnesia, we have to stop to have our moment of introversion, turn to ourselves, observe ourselves, analyze all the path we've taken so far, our life choices, beliefs, where did our beliefs, behaviors come from. Behavioral therapy helps a lot, I recommend it. The psychologist will do just that: help you analyze your entire timeline, what you've been doing all your life. You will have to accept that who you were was the best you could be with the resources available, whereas today, in the present, you have more resources, you can be more and better. You will have to forgive yourself, forgive your history, forgive those involved, heal, move on in life and let go of baggage that weighs a lot so that new baggage comes into your life, open yourself to new things.

It is to rescue yourself, to enter this journey of self-knowledge to bring out your essence. That's where your own glow is. That's personal power. To take possession of the person you are, to take possession of your essence, to be the protagonist and author of your own story: this is to be king and queen of your own life. Your life is your kingdom and a kingdom needs someone to rule.

Blood: Extraversion, energy, joy, expression and sensuality are usually quite loud and agitated. They are good communicators, with great adaptability and high spirits when they are in the light. When they are in the shadows they can end up being a little clumsy because they are agitated, inattentive, forgetful, superficial, exaggerated and impulsive.

Cholerics: Control, seriousness, rationality, ambition and organization. They are leadership personified and very methodical when they are in the light. When in the shadows they can be manipulative (in a negative way), insensitive, rude, intolerant, impatient and self-centered.

Melancholic: Sensitivity, artistic talent, loyalty, scientific intelligence, dedication. They are known for being introverted and being very attentive to details when they are in the light. When in the shadows, they can be pessimistic, selfish, inflexible, and excessively isolating.

Phlegmatic: Dreamers, spiritual, balanced, peaceful and observant. They say they are the easiest to deal with because they hardly lose their patience. They are very patient and well-disciplined and very reliable when in the light. When in the shade they can be slow and extremely aggressive. Phlegmatics keep bad feelings for so long that when they explode, you'd better get away, as they can act very cruelly.

Just to be clear: this has nothing to do with signs. There is no research that says the two things are correlated. For example: I, being a Pisces sign (the sign of esotericism, spirituality, zen, super-dreamer, patient and peaceful), should be phlegmatic, but I'm not. Actually, I'm sanguine.

So, as of this very moment as I am writing this article, no studies have emerged that correlate temperaments with astrology, although astrology is not just the sun sign. There is an entire astrological chart. Everyone has their own and that's for a future article.

Although they are not related, a Chinese science called physiognomy was discovered, which says that our face and body tell us who we are, our thoughts, how we function, our temperaments, how we act.

Believe it or not: I met a specialist in this area of temperaments, physiognomy, visagism, facial and body reading and the creation of an image of power, which just looking at a photo of me could describe me. By the way, for you to understand, she managed to talk about a certain aspect of my personality that only those who are always living with me understand. I never met this specialist in person and in less than 5 minutes of conversation she managed to describe subtle aspects in me.

I'm talking about these things because the study of temperaments, physiognomy and even astrology are tools of self-knowledge for you to bring out your true essence and make it your image of power.

Having an image of power, an image that inspires confidence, is not going after perfection, charging yourself too much, but paying attention to the person who matters most: you! It's taking care of that person who is the most important in your life: you! I realize that it's much easier to take care of the people we love, other people; so easy, that we end up forgetting.

Of course we must be careful with others, we must have the understanding that we are a whole and not a single being, alone in this universe. With that in mind, we would have to take very good care of ourselves in every way: physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual.

That's personal power. When you know yourself, take possession of who you are, no one will be able to define you and you don't allow yourself to be shaped by people or situations, you won't be a victim of your own circumstances.

When there is this rescue of our essence, we can find a balance and harmony, we externalize and express to people beyond our behavior. Self-knowledge puts us in the light, rescues us, so a lot changes. The way you talk, behave, the energy is different.

The feeling I have after having entered this journey of self-knowledge is of returning home after years away: even things I loved to do, that I didn't do for a long time, but that I came back.

Of course, this process of self-knowledge is long and never ends. It is a process of rescuing your essence. It's an ongoing thing. It is a path that we have to take for the healing of our being, of our inner child, to bring our essence and on top of that to build our image, our look.

Thank you for reading this article.