I hear the alarm clock ringing: time to wake up! I reach out to end the suffering of being woken up by the same music every day. “Alarm off, phew! What time is it? Wow… how many notifications, let me see…”. And there goes the first five, 10, 15 minutes of my day. "Enough of social media, I'll make the coffee". As I take the slices of bread and put them in the sandwich maker, I think: "what's today's schedule?" and in less than a minute I'm lost in my thoughts. But coffee, oh, coffee… When I realize it, its irresistible aroma invites me to this experience that is preparing it as if it were the first time. I hold the strainer (yes, cloth strainer) as I enjoy the water running through the powder and down to the last drop in my cup.
And every day is always the same: the cell phone alarm clock that subtly invites me to the technological world through notifications. On the other hand, the cafe invites me to return to the experience and I find myself totally immersed, enjoying the simplicity of the moment.
And as Chico Buarque used to say: “Every day she always does everything the same and shakes at six in the morning”. Our day-to-day script is always ready, whether it’s memorized in our minds or recorded in our phone’s diary: wake up, breakfast, study/work, lunch, work/study, dinner, study/physical activity/family time . Appointments, appointments, appointments… Every day, everything is always the same!
On social media, the same “good morning” in the family group, the same selfie recording some moment of the day (the look, the time of training or, in my case, the food, because, in addition to psychology, I also love to cook) . The reflective phrases that take us for a few moments, the surreally beautiful images, the memes and gifs of animals that make us fall apart with laughter… And, that's it, updated timeline! But still, always the same.
What's between the lines of our daily tasks, beyond what's apparent in posts and news feeds? It wouldn't be difficult to describe what our daily activities are and how we perform them, but what was the experience of preparing breakfast for the thousandth time today? “Normal, the usual”? I find myself thinking about how we have so automatically experienced things, how we have automatically existed. Sometimes, what we do throughout the day is so normal, so the same that we don't realize it and, once again, we activate the automatic mode. Are we, as a consequence of this automatism, losing the sensitive that is in the experience lived in each doing?
Maybe that's why it's so hard to remember what the experience of preparing breakfast was like, after all, “it's just one more meal, I need to check my schedule, social networks…”. You know when we drive in “automatic mode”? When we are immersed in our thoughts and, when we arrive at the destination, we ask ourselves “how did I end up here?”. Everyday situations make me think that we are living like this, in automatism, where time is not allowed to be wasted. Maybe few say, but many believe that enjoying the preparation of breakfast is a waste of time, after all, time is money. It may not be money to you, but it is certainly valuable and so it must be meticulously managed. Where does this “truth” come from?
Any resemblance to Charlie Chaplin's movie "Modern Times" does not seem to me to be purely coincidental. The German philosopher Martin Heidegger invites us to think how much absolute truths distance us from what we can be, in a more authentic way. For the author, we are inserted in a context of practices that dictates the way we should lead life, that is, we live life as usual, in a simply given and determined way.
One day, a colleague tried to convince me that I need to have the best smartphone. Like him, I once believed that I had the need to have an iPhone. This absolute truth was dissolved through constant questioning: is it a possibility and/or a necessity? What do I need in a cell phone? I've come to the conclusion that my 3 year old is still enough. He practically said I was crazy: “What do you mean? everyone wants to have an iPhone!”. But do I really want it, or do I want it because they say I should?
Another example: we are always connected, as the internet has outlined a new way of being and relating to others. Just like in our daily lives, social networks dictate what we should wear, talk, eat, share and how we should take care of our body. However, we are responsible for reflective movement and attention in each act, that is, in our most ordinary activities, as we are always subject to losing what is sensitive in the experience. In other words, the care of our existence, of remembering that there are no absolute truths, but it is up to each one to do what makes sense. I am not speaking of a universal meaning common to all, but a singular meaning of a truth originally his own.
Heidegger describes as “impersonality” the superficial way in which we are living and experiencing things today. We live impersonally when we do not see other possibilities of being able to be beyond what we are living/being.
And as for everyday life… yes! Every day probably “she” and we will continue doing everything the same, shaking at six, at seven, at eight o'clock in the morning. As the song itself says: “Sometimes the kiss will be with a mouth of mint, sometimes with a mouth of coffee or beans”. But it is up to us to feel (experience) the kiss that, despite being always the same, will always be unique. So, how was your breakfast preparation today?
