It's been exactly 6 years since, in a way, I try to spread the following message: "JUST LOVE". With this phrase having a broad meaning and which fits in the most diverse situations and tribulations of everyday life, with it I seek to encourage more and more people to feel with their hearts and minds full of good energies, aware that we receive everything back. that we emanate
Loving is a difficult act, much more than it seems in practice. It goes beyond the physical, it goes beyond the rational. Love derives from the soul, from the “heart”. To understand this, we need to expand our horizons.
Love manifests itself in many forms and ways and is ever-changing. As human evolution evolves, feelings also evolve. In antiquity, love was divided into seven types:
- Philautia;
- Pragma;
- Elementary School;
- Eros;
- Philia;
- Storge;
- Agape.
Of which I highlight two:
PHILAUTIA
The ancient philosophers said that Philautia is the love we have for ourselves, that is, self-love. This, perhaps, is the beginning of all our feelings, the beginning from which everything flows and derives. Love is born within us and, first, by and for us, and then it expands to others.
Philautia can appear in two ways: false self-love, which is equivalent to narcissism and arrogance, closely linked to power, money, appearances and a totally material world. The second way, considered the healthy way of Philautia, has a lot to do with self-esteem, purpose and commitment to ourselves, with trust and goodwill towards ourselves, expanding to others. It is here, then, that the “#only love me” arises, as it allows us to direct this pure love that we have for ourselves to the world around us, to people, animals, plants and everything we do and accomplish.
PRAGMA
Pragma is love that is based on the greater good, on dedication to the collective, to the other.
It is a love based on dedication to the greater good. It's a pragmatic love. Romance and attraction are often separated in favor of shared goals and compatibilities. This kind of love is often seen in couples that formed out of an arranged marriage or political alliance. It also inspires couples to make their relationship work for the sake of their children. Pragma is the kind of deep love and commitment that drives us to do the right thing. Many relationships start out as Eros or Ludos and later evolve into Pragma when these simpler forms of love are not enough to sustain.
With that I bring the text below, my perception of this feeling so present in human life:
of suffering
Jonathan Fortunato Idalence
“Whoever loves suffers”, say the ancients. Love itself does not bring suffering, but its absence does, and as Paulo Coelho says in the book “The Alchemist”: “The fear of suffering is worse than suffering itself”. Indeed it is. It is not love that makes us suffer, but the fear of its absence.
We are afraid of not being loved, we are afraid of the frustrations of the path of love, we are afraid of loneliness, and it is fear that causes suffering, not suffering itself.
We generate so much expectation on top of people, dreams, projects, relationships, whatever they are, friendships, loves and business. We put everything we have: our energy, our faith and our dreams, then we fight for everything to work out.
Sometimes we get into toxic relationships and let ourselves be dragged along for one, two, three or more years, loving, being dedicated, giving the best of us, until from one moment to the next, often without explanation, everything falls apart, ends and we remain inert, faced with a feeling of pain that we often do not know how to explain and perhaps really feel. This is the suffering of love, of the lack of love.
We get lost in such a way that, varying from person to person, the reactions are the most diverse: some mask their suffering by working, pretending to be unshakable, with smiles for everyone, with such a surreal energy that many ask: “How are you so okay?”, but inside, where no one really sees, we are a shard, in pieces, torn apart, trying to understand how everything has changed. Was it a hoax? How did we feel end?
In fact, our feeling is not over. The other's, yes, the other's culprit, of course, because I love, I'm here, I'm still here, fighting as always, loving as always, but what about the other? How did you manage to follow, love someone else, carry on, leave, smile? Ironic, no?
For the suffering of love is very fickle, as is love.
Thinking of blame or subjugating the other is the biggest mistake. Everything wears out. Relationships themselves have a certain validity period. It's not love that's over; it's everything else that no longer fits our ideals of love. Both collaborate for the start. Both collaborate towards the end. The only love that is lonely is self-love, because others need the other to exist.
We can spend a lifetime with a person and not know them, but if we think about it, we are always in constant change, so we often barely know each other. How to know the other? How to judge your feelings like that? Woe is me, woe is me, will this love ever end?
For some time now I have repeated, like a mantra, the following sentence, which may be the title of my next book: “Just love”. With this sentence, I want people to experience love, but real love, without expectations, without frustrations, knowing that nothing lasts forever and that the most beautiful thing to be lived are our moments, one day at a time. Yesterday is past, tomorrow is too uncertain. We only have today. Only today can we love. Only today can we live. Only today can we fight and give our best.
Sounds confusing, doesn't it? It's ok, love is confused, feelings are confused and maybe this text doesn't make any sense to you, but to others it makes total sense, just like the letter of Saint Paul to the Corinthians, in which the famous passage about love is found. genuine, in agape Greek:
“Even if I spoke the tongues of men and angels, and did not have Love, I would be like a ringing metal or a tinkling bell. And even if I had the gift of prophecy, and knew all mysteries and all science, and even if I had all faith, so that I could move mountains, and did not have Love, I would be nothing. And even if I distributed all my fortune to support the poor, and even if I gave my body to be burned, if I didn't have Love, none of it would profit me. Charity is long-suffering and benign; Love is not envious, does not treat lightly, is not puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not seek its own interests, is not provoked, does not suspect evil, does not rejoice in injustice, but rejoices in the truth. Everything suffers, everything believes, everything hopes and everything supports. The love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be annihilated; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is science, it will disappear; because in part we know and in part we prophesy; but when that which is perfect comes, then that which is in part will be annihilated. When I was a boy, I spoke like a boy, I felt like a boy, I spoke like a boy, but as soon as I became a man, I ended up with boyish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then we shall see face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know as I am also known. Now therefore faith, hope and love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is Love.”
You might also like:
- Tips for taking good care of your love
- 10 tips for living well according to the Golden Rule and the Ethics of Reciprocity
- Think if technology was able to change love
- Discover what self-love is and how it can help you
- Find the ideal love that is part of your life
I hope that you feel love, that you love yourself, love your neighbor and be kind, without interests or ulterior motives, and that at some point in your journey you are worthy to share your life with someone who fits exactly the moment and the moment. the moment you find yourself, because life is a train station: people come and go and they all enter our lives at the right time and leave the same way. What remains are the memories, the smiles and the tears, those that, after we understand what each person has added to us, cease to be important to a certain extent, because, like smiles, tears also strengthen us.
# only love me
