O emotional illness of these mothers it begins when they are babies and it is important to know that they were not born that way, but that they settled within this pattern of functioning because of some real and very difficult history that certainly passed without having the opportunity or conditions to organize themselves psychically in a way that different. As a result, these mothers end up projecting onto their offspring the variations of emotional sensations from such traumatic experiences that were poorly resolved. The image is of a strong, cold wind permeating their childhoods, causing a severe flu that was never properly treated, much less cured. Many of these mothers, in addition to being perverse narcissists, are still linked to other dissociative pathological conditions.
The psychological illness of the perverse narcissistic mother reveals itself in the total emotional detachment, and the connections, when they occur, are part of a very well elaborated theater that both the victims, as well as the family and society have difficulty understanding.
Although they camouflage this aspect, what drives them are your endless desires for self-satisfaction, which makes real connection with the other very difficult. When they have children, they cannot be sensitive to their demands, and most of the time end up being negligent in the most varied themes of development. There is no empathy and the demands on children can be overwhelming. They are never fully satisfied, and children often don't know what they did wrong or what they could do to receive a look of legitimate love.
As much as they do to receive approval and a look of validation from these mothers, absolutely nothing will make them leave what we can call “delusion about themselves”, since they are delighted with their own demands. On the contrary, the more they want affection, the more they will annoy and the more they will be despised. It won't matter to get good grades, be nice, help with cleaning the house or whatever, the general rule is to shut up, accept and not be seen, understanding that when it appears it becomes a nuisance that must be destroyed. The weapons are critical and invalidation of the conquests added to the abuses of power that, many times, aim to harm the healthy demands of socialization of the children. These learn to survive in an anxious way, afraid of making mistakes and with very low self-esteem.
Most daughters of perverse narcissistic mothers spend far too much time doing everything they can to earn a look of affection and admiration that never comes, and in the midst of this gnawing sense of lack, and because of that, many go around the world in the same search being the easiest prey for abusers today.
Just when they wake up and they realize the plot where they are is that there is a real possibility of heading towards maps of lives quite different from all the illness and pain that they underwent in the name of survival. Reprocessing and reprogramming beliefs of less value about themselves, inaugurating self-love at maximum power and the security of recognizing oneself in what one is, will be one of the countless gains of this conquest of lucidity. Competent therapy in this area is also of unquestionable benefit so that this leap in life can occur.
The more awake, the better!
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