It is necessary to silence to hear

The selfish silence:

I remember very well the time when I started my studies and became aware of the challenges that would soon arise. Anyone who decides to study psychology, and navigate the immensity that is the human being, sooner or later, is faced with the subject of this article.

In college, in the midst of so many theories, philosophical currents, techniques and approaches that were presented to me, nothing made me more thoughtful than the fact that, at some point in the course, and, fatally, in professional life, I would have to face and learn to live in another way with “silence”. It was the first time that I was worried about the subject, and I don't think there will ever be a last one. I am still surprised to this day.

Silence has always been mine, and that's how I related to it. As one who relates to an employee or subordinate. Sometimes through music or writing, but always in a condition of dominance, which brought me security and comfort.

Surely, you've been through situations where you felt uncomfortable with that hiatus that silence causes between two people, and quickly launched a new subject to break the uncomfortable moment. And regardless of what topic you started, the fact is that you chose to simply talk about anything to end this absence of sounds.

However, the interesting thing is that, over time, if you start to observe and try to understand the “silence of the other”, which invariably assigns a new meaning to yours, you will realize that, through this gap of sounds, we can hear other melodies and see new possibilities for coexistence, intimacy and complicity. You have to silence to hear.

There is more wisdom and meaning in moments of silence than in many conversations.

The silence exercised:

Several oriental peoples from millenary cultures experienced the benefits of silent practice in their daily activities, and such peoples, also known for the exercise of meditation, chose to do it in absolute silence. They believed that only in this state would they be able to find the stillness of thoughts and acceptance, originating from reflection and self-knowledge.

Western people, on the other hand, communicate differently. We like to express thoughts and feelings through words and gestures. Generally speaking, we talk more and listen less.

For Eastern culture, this makes it difficult to understand contemplation, which is so based on emptiness and silence. Negative space is a concept inherited from Zen Buddhism, and has had a great influence on Eastern cultures and, above all, Japan. In the past, the eastern country was not rich and abundant and, because of that, all the cultural excellence of the place was based on the optimization of resources.

Time, at that time, was so precious that it was necessary to learn to express more with less. Communication was often done through the look and economy of gestures. By talking too much, they believed that we could be limiting all the truth that was deposited in the void. The gap left by the excess of gesticulations and words was filled in our imagination.

However, in today's world, thousands of years later, it still seems very difficult to silence our inner noise. Therefore, being silent with yourself under these conditions seems more than a simple task. It practically becomes a revolution. But the good news is that you have all the tools to get started.

You can start by stopping for a few minutes a day and trying to just focus on your breathing. Find a chair or somewhere you can sit with your spine straight and try to bring your attention to the movements that come from breathing. For the moment, try not to worry about the various thoughts, future or past, that will go through your head. The proposal here is just an exercise in reflection on the importance of the practice of silence.

Paying attention to the breath is also bringing your awareness to the present moment. It's accepting the invitation to look at your life from another perspective. (Whoever is more interested in this topic, follow the link to my last post – Click here to access)

The road is long, but experiencing the act of breathing with clarity, awareness and curiosity is the first step in telling your many noisy thoughts that you are in control right now. It is exercising silence in its purest and most genuine state.

“There is a silence inside me. And that silence has been the source of my words.” Clarice Lispector

Hugs! To the next!!