The meaning of an effective resolution of the family constellation is centered on non-judgment.
“Reconciliation meets non-judgment” – Orders for Help (Bert Hellinger).
NOT JUDGING is a very delicate issue to deal with. Having the understanding of NOT JUDGING does not mean forgetting, making us a holiness, but reconciling with life. Take off the unnecessary weight that we often unconsciously assume.
The more we condemn or judge our parents, the more we become “entangled” with their problems and fates (in many difficult and heavy cases).
Carrying these tangles with us limits us, weakens us, suffocates us and is not healthy at all. They hide like "us" in our life when we don't try to untie them.
Non-judgment does not imply tolerating everything, but understanding the limits of our understanding of the whole. In every family system there should be limits on what should be allowed (or not allowed), as long as it is respectful.
Non-judgment requires training of the mind and constant observation of oneself, and the family constellation comes to make this process much easier.
The "non-judgment" is increasingly effective, given the level of expansion of consciousness. He makes us understand that we are not perfect and that we cannot demand perfection from anyone.
The biggest challenge is to exercise non-judgment as observers without leaving our place as a parent or child.
As much as we don't want to look at unresolved issues with our parents, this can have harmful consequences, including for our health, and this psychosomatics elucidates us in its approach to the somatization of repressed and unworked emotions.
We can only take the teachings into our lives and take what our parents were able to do under their conditions with what they were also able to receive and transmit to us. It is impossible to fulfill all of our parents' needs and expectations, any more than they can do the same to us.
You might also like:
- When you judge, who becomes prisoner is you!
- Free yourself from the fear of judgment
- Discover what are the processes for self-knowledge
- How to judge less? See in the article
- Boost your self-esteem with these tips
The more we condemn our parents, the more we act like them and the more we suffer in the lack of what they could not give us, and the lack of which we seek to compensate in many ways, even destroying who we are, whether through addictions or diseases.
When we let go of what we don't have to carry, we tune in to what belongs only to ourselves, so we can supply ourselves with what we lacked and what makes us more complete in our essence.
