If you are looking for a quick attainment of pleasure, they are effective, in a few clicks you can already get someone. Similar to delivery deliveries, after all if we order taxi, pizza, books via apps, why not love?
If you are looking for something more than fast food, then things may not work so well. And it can hit again that inevitable frustration regarding love affairs. Many imagine that in this sea of ​​possibilities there will be someone interesting that they would not otherwise find, they enter because, in these times, finding someone is difficult and the application offers a rich catalog of possibilities.
Applications seduce for their offer and ease. “It's so easy, you don't need to invest anything, not even in the program”, say some users. And, of course, the tool makes it possible to obtain pleasure at almost no cost, without investment. In other times, to stay with someone you had to do a certain ritual, ask the candidate to go out, there was an expense. Today, the application allows you to optimize the cost-benefit ratio in the best commercial logic, the usufruct at the lowest cost on the market, that's the knot, because nothing works in these terms in the market of affections, in this realm it is necessary to learn the experience of exchange, and of honest exchange.
For an honest exchange in the field of affections, there must be availability for the meeting. This is where an obstacle arises, because every encounter involves the fear of what is out of our control. What if I like it, and he/she doesn't like me? What if I fall in love and lose myself in that passion? So much can happen, will my heart be ready? In fact, it never is. Love is a risk, but only those who risk the fire know this flame.
In our society it is easier to bare the body than the mind or spirit; easier to share the body than ideas, desires, dreams and fears, as these are private matters that make us vulnerable, there is fear of the fragility of sharing what really matters. That core has become dangerous, and people go straight for sex. After all, the body is an object and can be treated as such. Washed it, it's clean! The problem is that the intimacy that starts at the physical level falls into a void when it stays there.
The individual needs courage simultaneously on several levels to overcome isolation. Any true relationship requires courage, the ability to risk one's self in the hope of achieving meaningful intimacy. Will the relationship grow or will it destroy us? The only sure thing is that if we give ourselves completely, for better or worse, we won't get away with it.
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- The story of a book and a love
- Loving is the prerogative of the brave
- Rebellion in Courage
Not infrequently, right after leaving, even if it was great (or especially if it was great), the user comes back to the application and gives a like to another candidate. Looks
a paradox? Not in our time, in which anxiety and fear put us in motion, preventing the connection between subjects, who, in turn, complain of loneliness.
And encounters are possibilities, and relationships are constructions.
The article contains thoughts present in the book “Os Homens no Jogo do Amor”, written by the author together with Thais de Menezes, and recently released by Editora Appris, in São Paulo.
