Christmas is a holiday awaited by many people, regardless of religious beliefs, as it is the time to gather around the table to share supper, distribute gifts and wait, with the children, for Santa Claus to arrive. On the other hand, celebrating Christmas as a family can also generate some stress.
Although Christmas is a time of peace and joy, and many people have fond memories of past Christmases, the date can also be synonymous with disagreements between family and friends.
Imagine meeting that relative who loves to ask uncomfortable questions, or feeling overwhelmed with work while most have fun and/or complain, or even seeing that infamous uncle who exaggerates when toasting.
All these and other (infinite) situations can generate unease among the guests, making the night not end well. In this article, we will unravel the main stressors of the Christmas season and bring tips on what to do to better deal with Christmas tension.
So it's Christmas
We spend the whole year counting down to the holidays, and when they arrive, so do problems and irritations. If you think about traveling, your favorite destinations are crowded, as are supermarkets, malls, restaurants, tourist attractions in the city… it seems like everyone left home at the same time!
And then, after a long and exhausting day, where you've committed to doing a thousand things at once and still need to prepare a table full of Christmas dishes and delicacies. This, of course, is the surefire recipe for physical and emotional exhaustion.
This happens to anyone who sees any meaning in Christmas, of course. For many others, this holiday can be linked to bad feelings, such as depression and anxiety, for example.
People who have recently lost loved ones, who are far from their family members, or families who do not currently have enough resources to celebrate Christmas “as the dress dictates”, may become depressed or have some degree of emotional discomfort at this time.
In this context, it is normal to feel impatience and irritation. So, would the solution be to isolate yourself from everything and everyone and not celebrate Christmas? Or is it possible to survive all the stress during Christmas as a family?
christmas melancholy
Christmas is seen as the end of a cycle, of a period of our lives. It is time to renew the goals, reinforce the votes and, consequently, revive the expectations that were not fulfilled in the last year.
It's also normal to compare ourselves with others, especially when it seems like everyone has a perfect and united family, except for us. And there's nothing more frustrating than not being able to give that expensive gift your child craves.
These are some emotional triggers that can bring a lot of unhappiness and dissatisfaction. If this sadness persists after this period, the ideal is to seek a specialist to better understand the reasons for this melancholy.
Tips for Surviving the Stress of Family Christmas
- 1 – Know how to differentiate expectation from reality. It's no use idealizing a perfect Christmas, but impossible to achieve. No getting into debt for gifts or decorations! Starting the new year with exorbitant bills to pay will not be at all reassuring. The emotional value of seeing everyone together, the presence of family members and the attention given to each one are far more important than any expensive gift.
- 2 – Take time to take care of yourself. Take advantage of rest days to promote physical and psychological well-being. Make time for yourself to do whatever you want: exercise, read a book, cook, meet friends you haven't seen in a long time, walk the dog, go to the movies—or just do nothing. When we take care of ourselves, we will automatically be better for others.
- 3 – Learn to identify the first signs of stress. If you feel like you're starting to get irritated, stop whatever you're doing, take a breath, and recalculate your plans. Share chores with the family, like shopping, cooking or decorating the Christmas tree, for example. This can be a great opportunity to spend more time with your family! Also, don't do anything just to please others. Respect your limits and your emotions.
- 4 – Do not overdo the consumption of alcohol. This substance can help you relax, at first; but, later, it can end up intensifying the stress, since alcohol potentiates sadness, anxiety and depression.
- 5 – As far as possible, keep your diet and sleep routine balanced. Tiredness can trigger irritation. However, if you eat a little more calories or extrapolate your bedtime a little, don't beat yourself up. Remember: balance is everything, and perfection is unattainable!
- 6 – Set limits and rules with children, but also respect the will of the little ones. Do not force a child to interact with strangers when they are clearly uncomfortable.
- 7 – Beware of task overload. If you can't do everything you set out to do for Christmas, don't blame yourself! Divide the tasks you can, such as party chores, for example, among the other guests. If everything doesn't go as expected, that shouldn't be cause for guilt or regrets.
Finally, allow yourself to be sad. Sadness is a valid feeling, we just can't remain sad for what we can't control. If Christmas brings up bad memories, allow yourself to feel that pain, welcome that feeling, and then let it go.
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- Find out how to eat healthy for the holidays
- Here's how to clear negative energy from your life
- Understand the relationship between harmony and happiness
We do not have the power to change stress-inducing events, but we can decide how we will respond to them. Each obstacle can be seen as a new challenge to be overcome. When we idealize less and relativize situations more, we enjoy the best that life has to offer us!
