Law is always something that puts us in a place of obligation, of rigidity, which leads us to the need to act according to a standard, that is, the law makes us have to act or behave in a way that we do not always like or want, or even in a way that takes away our freedom.
And that's exactly it! Like it or not, we are all subject to laws and not only to the laws of men, but to universal laws. The entire Universe is subject to the laws of the most diverse origins.
And what does the Constellation have to do with it?
All! If we look at our family as a system (which it is) we will understand that all systems are subject to specific laws. A system is understood as everything that coexists in groups: family, company, religious egrégores, professionals, animals, plants, the planet, in short, everything is organized in systems.
Since we are governed by systemic laws, we will act and behave, UNCONSCIOUSLY, in order to comply with such laws.
In a family, it is quite common to observe how much we desire and we tend to say that we will never be like our parents, denying and judging the way they think, act and do things in life.
On the other hand, because we are within this family system, we will tend to unconsciously do exactly like the parents.
blind love
What leads us to repeat patterns is exactly blind love, a love that is not conscious, a love that is born from the desire to belong and not disconnect from this system. It is this blind and deep love that directs us and leads us to life. We may not accept that we lead our lives unconsciously, but that is the essence of every element of the system.
The Systemic Laws
The Orders of Love, studied by Bert Hellinger, are based on 3 fundamental Systemic Laws.
Let's understand what each of them is?
Law of Belonging
Each and every individual in a family, in a system, has the right to belong to it, regardless of what that individual is, does or has done.
Systems do not operate with judgment or the dual notion of right or wrong, good or bad. If you were born into a system, into a family, you belong to it and you must remain so.
If someone is excluded, the system will seek a way to balance itself again and someone will take the place of this excluded through behaviors and problems of various orders until at some point the awareness arises that this element needs to be reintegrated and seen.
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We can cite, for example, the case of an uncle who was expelled from the family for some reason and, suddenly, a nephew can take the place of that uncle, acting in a similar way. This is a mess.
Law of Hierarchy
All those who came before take precedence and when this law is circumvented, the one who arrogates himself even unconsciously to taking the place of a father, a grandfather, acting as if he were greater than them, entanglement arises and one becomes entangled with the other's life.
A common example of this is children who believe they are bigger than their parents, smarter, more capable, smarter. This child is out of his place, occupying another one and, at some point, he will feel the weight he carries for other people.
Law of Equilibrium
In a relationship between couples and friends, for example, there must be a balance of exchange. In a relationship, when one gives more than the other, the one who receives too much feels smaller, indebted and, if this situation persists, the relationship tends to end. Unbalanced relationships between giving and receiving place individuals in inequality and this does not generate a healthy relationship.
It is important to emphasize that all this happens unconsciously and it is quite common for these dynamics to happen without people being aware of it.
In this way, knowing the Family and Systemic Constellations helps both in relation to the leaps of consciousness, as well as the change of conduct and behaviors, providing a new look at each situation.
Dare!
